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Learn how Sex and Love have more in common that you would believe...
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Uniting Sex & Love:

The magic in long term relationships...

This is where we get serious in relationship...seriously powerful at least! You'll Sex and Love Applediscover how the separation of these two very dynamic, and in many ways very similar forces, ultimately limits what we're capable of in long term relationship. This includes  the relationship we have with ourselves as well as with others.

The first thing to do in reuniting them is to understand their similarities and perhaps take them out of the boxes you currently have them in. 

In the beginning of relationship it seems that sex and love are somehow effortlessly entwined. Love is flowing between partners and this desire flows easily into sex, we’re totally into each other, seeing heaven in each other’s eyes and wanting to touch and connect a lot of the time. This combination of fully open hearts and awakening desire is why the relating is so effortless and the sex is usually the most frequent, and the most satisfying.

Over time unresolved little hurts, disappointments and rejections happen that stop this open flow. To keep ourselves safe from further hurt we unconsciously start to separate love and sex into two different places in order to protect where we now feel most vulnerable.

disconnected coupleThis is especially true between men and women. Men start to want sex whilst keeping their heart protected (or don’t want sex at all). Women avoid sex due to feeling a lack of connection and love, or seek satisfaction purely through the mechanics of pleasure without involving their hearts. This has the twofold effect of making desire to connect less likely to occur and the sex less fulfilling when it happens, leaving couples feeling uncertain, frustrated and isolated.

So what do we actually mean when we talk about sex and love, and isn’t it dangerous to re unite them? Well, take a peek for yourself and see what you think..
Of course there are times when we need appropriate boundaries in both sex and love, but do we somehow over do it? Tie them up in neat little boxes in our minds to keep ourselves safe and in control. In intimate adult relationships, with personal boundaries respected, this combination is not dangerous, it's the vital juice and the biggest gift in truly committed relationship...

Whilst we don’t pretend to know all about these two powerful forces (and it would be foolish to claim it!) we don’t back away in working within them. So let's take a little look...

Love is extremely hard to define.

If asked probably each of us would come up with a different definition, which says a lot in itself. Ultimately we know love through the experience of it, an experience that lies beyond even the greatest poets’ words. Love is generally seen to be a positive thing, part of a human’s higher self.

Biologically: Love is a survival tool- a mechanism we’ve evolved as a species to promote long term relationships through a sense of safety and security, for our mutual defence and the safe raising of children. It’s a powerful neurological condition like hunger or thirst that we often seem to have no control over. It’s a cocktail of powerful chemicals for creating attraction, action, pleasure, euphoria, attachment and bonding.

Psychologically: Love can be as simple as a shared cup of tea or as complex as that which helps define our innate desire to live. Love comes in many different forms, such as playful affection or romance, a desire to understand and support, or a deep bonding commitment. We can nurture love through acts of kindness, gratitude, goodwill and heart connection makes fear your friendpassion; we can receive it through the same. It can be highly personal as with friends and family, or in a moment of unique connection with a stranger, and it’s the most personal in intimate relationship. Love can also be totally impersonal, such as our generalized love for humanity, our country or our God. We can also experience love of the self, not self centred, but being centred in ourselves, taking care of and having respect for who we are.  It is inappropriate to put our need for love onto another.

Spiritually: Love is full of paradoxes. There is nothing love cannot face and there are things we cannot face at all without it. The experience of love is subjective, unique to each person, in each moment, as we experience it within us. It can be felt as warmth, fullness, a pleasant heaviness in the heart. It can equally be a feeling of unlimited freedom and expansion. We can experience it alone or with another, or unconditionally from God/Spirit. It is completely free yet is powerful enough to create bonds that extend beyond death. As infants we can literally die without loving touch, as adults we also die, at least on the inside without it. It is a mystery, it cannot be seen, but it can be felt, and it transforms that which feels it. It can be the greatest gift and the greatest tragedy.

Sex on the other hand is very easy to describe because we can see it.

sexual man and womanSex can refer to any activity in which sexual arousal occurs for the purpose of sexual gratification ie. the satisfaction of a sexual desire.

Yet ultimately we know sex as a feeling and an experience too, for there is much more to it than what we see.

We've started with Love, now read on about Sex and see where the similarities lie...
For more read on...

 

Blessings for the upcoming Festive Season this year to our valued clients and readers, thankyou for your support in 2015!

 Take a moment to really touch someone's heart this Christmas.

 

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