Weâ€™re always too tired to have sexâ€¦
What can we do about it?
Statistics say that long term couples are working harder and having less sex than ever before. This is due, at least in part, to the type of sex people believe is required- an exhausting huff and puff performance. Itâ€™s not particularly tempting, especially last thing at night and can easily degenerate into the scratching of an itch and a release of tension more than any kind of fulfilling pleasure or meaningful connection. Eventually even scratching the itch becomes too hard.
Making a shift from sex where you relax at the end to one where you relax at the beginning and allow the pleasure to arise from within is a whole different ballgame (if youâ€™ll pardon the pun!)
Our sexual desire and pleasure is also about much more than just what happens in bed. Itâ€™s about how weâ€™re caring for ourselves outside of the bedroom, because energy for sex is the same as energy for life. How stressed and tired we are, how disconnected we might be from our partners, emotionally shut down, working in jobs we donâ€™t particularly like or doing very long hours, with no time for relaxation or anything creative, possibly resulting in a lack of exercise, a poor diet or excess alcohol impact on our energy for sex. Not to mention the use of common medications such as those for high blood pressure, anti depressants and more that also lower our libidoâ€¦
So there are two things you can look at in regards to being too tired for sex- whatâ€™s happening in the rest of your life thatâ€™s draining your energy and leaving you too tired for sex? And what kind of sex are you having? The kind thatâ€™s all about the release of tension (that actually drains your energy further) or an exchange of energy that is connecting, rejuvenating and inspiringâ€¦
The surprising thing is, both people are wanting the same thing. We've been conditioned to think it's more different than it really is. We show you how here
If you suspect maybe it's not actually about the sex but it's being played out here read about What if Sex isn't the Problem?