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Another year has nearly passed by. I am reflecting on this year and it’s almost the same as last year, another Covid year, except we are all a year older and hopefully wiser! I really hope you have kept well and your loved ones too.

Thank goodness for Zoom and other apps that lets us see our loved ones faces. Think what life would be like if this was 1991!

In this Newsletter

I have worked with many clients during the last year and a half of Covid and am seeing a big trend. Revenge Procrastination. I will offer my solutions to this below.

And for some light relief, I am sharing my go to favourite de stress tool, Tibetan Sound Bowls. As we all need some time out for some quality relaxation this festive season.

Revenge Procrastination

Are you a Revenge Procrastinator?

In my, now distant, HR career, before CBT entered my life, I was prone to working 70 hour weeks. Each evening I got home at 9pm, absolutely wrecked tired. Ate something comforting and not necessarily healthy. Switched on the television and proceeded to watch TV until 12.30pm. Then I woke at 6:30am and was in the office before 7am to start the day all over again. It went like that for a good many years. I am sure some of you will recognise this behaviour!

In the last 18 months the switch to working from home hasn’t been as wonderful, as it first appeared to be, for a lot of my clients. Some report starting work before 8am, working mostly through lunch. Finishing for a break at 5 or 6pm and having dinner, and some exercise. Then, then switching back on to work after 8pm to do more work!!! Until 10pm then they watch Netflix or similar, and then add in social media, until the early hours of the morning. This is not healthy for the body and mind. What kind of lifestyle is this? Something will have to give. Unfortunately, this work and life style is becoming more normalised.

This has led to some weird behaviour, which I could identify with in my HR career. Revenge procrastination.

What is Revenge Procrastination

Revenge Procrastination is widespread. The definition of this weird behaviour, originally and somewhat boringly was called ‘bedtime procrastination’ was defined in a 2014 study Kroese, Floor M.; De Ridder, Denise T. D.; Evers, Catharine; Adriaanse, Marieke A. (2014). "Bedtime procrastination: introducing a new area of procrastination". Frontiers in Psychology. It’s when people put off going to sleep to engage in leisure time aka television or social media. Sounds familiar?

The Chinese renamed this to the much more sinister ‘Revenge Procrastination’, as people are taking revenge on their long working days, and a lack of control over their working week, by staying up late and making up for lost leisure time. It was also found in another study that people with high stress levels during the day are particularly susceptible. This is very much a self sabotaging way of trying to seek some control over their lives, without much thought to the consequences.

Unfortunately, this is backfiring for fairly obvious reasons. The procrastinators still have to get up early and put another gruelling days work in, after some pretty shoddy sleep. The only revenge they are getting is revenge on themselves. This is pure masochistic behaviour. It’s not healthy and it is harmful.

Bedtime procrastination can cause sleep deprivation. This leads to slow thinking, low attention levels, bad memory, bad decision making, stress, anxiety and irritation. If sleep deprivation is not treated quickly, long term consequences include heart disease, diabetes, obesity, weakened immune system, pain, hormone issues, and mental health issues. What Is Revenge Bedtime Procrastination? (webmd.com)

What can be Done About This?

If you think you have Revenge Procrastination, the first step is becoming aware that this is an issue for you.

The next step, is to switch your evening routine up. If you are watching TV maybe try and turn the programme off at a particularly dull point. I did this experiment on myself and it really works. As most television content is available to watch another time. Then you won’t want to see what happens next. All TV series are made to hook you, so don’t play their game.

A client of mine mentioned the great idea of having a ‘Hard Stop’ at a reasonable time of day, when you switch off any notifications and stop working.

Make sure your weekend is fun and mostly screen free. Use it wisely. Live for the weekend. If you want to stay in that high pressured, long hours, job, I do hope there are benefits. But the quid pro quo is usually forsaking Monday to Friday quality free time, for the sake of the company. Make peace with that. Remind yourself of what you are aiming for.

A famous Investment Bank once used a graduate recruitment advert, which said, ‘Give us your twenties and we’ll make you a millionaire by thirty!’ Quite. I wonder what they did when they got to 30?

If you are having a realisation that there must be more to life than working all the hours of the week, there probably is. I say probably, as I don’t know what your individual talents or savings account look like. I’m not going to say leave your job, as the grass may not be greener. Only you can determine that for yourself.

Alternatively, make your work evenings work for you. No television and no phones or screens at all. Put some music on, play a narrated book, dim the lights, eat well and mindfully, go for a walk, have a long bath, call somebody and have a quality conversation, with no distracting in-box pinging you.

If you do work from your bedroom, make it at a desk. Put bright lights on during the day mimicking an office environment. Clear up your desk putting everything out of sight in the evening. Switch the lights off and leave the bedroom until bed-time.

Always go to bed and to sleep at the same time ensuring a minimum of 7 hours sleep. This builds a habit that your brain will love.

I hope this has given you some help, if you are a ‘Revenge Procrastinator’.

Blissful Sounds

I love listening to sound waves and relaxing music. I find it extremely calming and relaxing.

This is my personal go to, when I need to relax. Tibetan Bowls. It’s lengthy so no need to play it all, just 10 minutes will be enough.

Have a great Christmas and New Year!

Best wishes Clare