Maybe a disappointment is a reminder to love what simply IS
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“Anytime you suffer a setback
or disappointment,
put your head down
and plow ahead.”
― Les Brown 

Good morning, dear <<Name>>. How was your week?  We had a good week - and the theme was all fancy coffeeabout re-entry of sorts.

See, JB was on an international trip last week to South America.  He returned late on Sunday, and we're trying to get back into routines in addition to getting caught up with household chores like getting back to regular cooking and laundry.   SO much laundry.

Though I stayed home, I was supposed to have traveled as well.

No, I wasn't going to South America, but was scheduled to do a solo trip to Disney World. 

Yes, a trip to Disney. By myself. And I was SO looking forward to my sunrise at the parkadventures. What I would learn about myself...and how I could best prepare for a big family trip this winter.

I didn't go.

With all the uncertainty around Hurricane Dorian it was the best decision to cancel. And I was incredibly disappointed. 

Yet, I still had a good week. Well, I had a good week after I allowed myself a day to wallow ;-)

I had already cleared my calendar for the week so, though I did a little work, I mostly rested.

I read a couple of novels (Louise Penny's latest!), worked through a pre-publication copy of my friend Theresa's book (pictures above), and had coffee out almost every day. But eating out didn't stop there - I went out for an early dinner most nights, and got lots of extra sleep. I went to the park every day for a long walk and coffee and theresa's bookvisited the local historical park.

No, it wasn't hanging out with Mickey and watching fireworks.

But that doesn't mean that my disappointment at a cancelled vacation was the end of the world. Nor did that mean that I let the disappointment keep me from putting my head down and focusing on what I most needed.

We all spend so much time and effort focusing on those big events, like planning a vacation, and it's easy to get lost in the importance to make ordinary days feel nourishing.

There's a lot happening in my world business wise, by the way. And I'd love to have you join me if I can serve you.

My Home Office class begins on Monday We walk through the process of setting up your home office, tidying it up, and creating systems that support your life and business.

AND my Eleven week course - Finally Love Your Life - will begin another run beginning on September plotting and planning on the patio29th.  After some amazing feedback from the ladies that took the first run of the course, there will be some small changes here and there.

Most significantly is that though there is 11 weeks of material, we will be taking a couple of breaks during the class to allow time to process, catch-up, and deal with life.  We'll finish up before the Christmas holidays for sure and I can think of no better way to wrap 2019 and prepare for an amazing 2020.

IF you know you want to join in, use code LoveMeIn2019 to save 25%.  This also applies if you want some one-on-one coaching as well.

So tell me my dear, how do YOU handle disappointment? What does time off, making every day the parknourishing look and feel like for you? Can you find some love in the every day moments?

What chores feel like re-entry to you?  What allows you to feel loved and grateful? What do you need to shift in order to remember that the every day parts of life matter?  What can I do to help? 

I love hearing your stories and helping you find the resources you need to create a life you love.

With so much love...........


From the blog:  You Can Create the LIfe You Desire No Matter How Unhappy You May Be

Most of what I write in my capacity as a life coach is how I stay devoted to my desire to live a conscious life, because I know that the biggest challenge to staying devoted to the kind of life we say we want to live requires routines, rituals, and a variety of little tricks and tools to help us.

I am the first to admit that my life is far from perfect, but that, despite this (or maybe because of it) I am still happy each and every day. Does this mean I’m walking around in a blissful haze of happiness all day, every day? Of course not! But I’ve come to understand that I can choose to shift my mood and better manage the challenges that living inevitably brings to all of us.

The tools and stories I share here draw mostly from the present-day view of my life. Though I deal with some challenges, rarely do I experience soul-level debilitating pain. Stress? Yes. Anger? Of course. Sadness? Unquestionably. I also regularly experience feelings of overwhelm, frustration, fear, jealousy, disappointment, and disconnection.

However, I also regularly experience excitement, worthiness, pleasure, playfulness, joy, and other such delightful feelings.

You can create a life you life


When I tell you that I love my daily life, it’s not a line I toss out as a piece of my branding. It’s a peek into what I have created. It’s not me gloating about what I have achieved, but a conscious effort to share what I have learned.

When I dig into the past, I try not to linger there too long. If you were to know me before 2004, you would have met a woman who, not only was unhappy. But I was experiencing day after day of gut-level misery. I popped anti-depressants and numbed myself with food, alcohol, and exercise. As a child I learned that it was best to wear the mask of “I Live a Happy and Picture Perfect Life,” so none of my friends really knew how bad things had become.

My husband wasn’t my partner, but my adversary. I lived in an almost constant state of shame thanks to my lack of integrity with my own values. Though one of my top values is truth, I became a habitual liar. Because when I or either of our daughters displayed our imperfections in any way (especially with behavior problems at school), he would go overboard in punishment. Most damaging to all of us was his complete withdrawal of affection if anyone committed an “infraction” when he would refuse to even speak to whoever had been “bad” for days and weeks at a time.

When I had finally had enough of barely surviving and found the courage to divorce him, I was terrified. I had built a perfect facade of a life and now “everyone” would see me as a failure.

I worried about how I was going to pay the bills, parent two girls, and redefine my own identity. Because, who was I if I wasn’t a “wife”? I knew that I had to do it from the inside out, but had no clue where to begin. I only had the kernel of the idea that if I ever wanted to be happy, it was up to me to find faith in myself.

It was up to me to do the work to change what I didn’t like about myself and my life. I studied, read, went to therapy, went to church, traveled, worked with a coach, and found the tools that worked for me.

And, baby, let me tell you, I made a hell of a lot of mistakes. It was two steps forward, three steps back in those first months. When I finally did start gaining traction, when the happy days began to outnumber the crappy days, I didn’t want to believe that it could last.

Life didn’t change overnight. Every time I made progress, I had to choose to stay devoted to the process of creating the kind of life I wanted to live.

I will be honest with you: while I have abstract memories of those days when my life wasn’t like it is now, I don’t really recall them in detail. The human mind is such a glorious thing that when we create the kind of life we desire to live and stay devoted to the practice of honing it, we forget much of the pain we had before.

What we remember are the lessons. We remember glimpses of what life was like, but looking back sometimes seems as if we are gazing into the life of someone else.  It’s up to us to guard ourselves from the triggers that could propel is back into our old ways.

No matter how bad life may be. No matter how numb you may feel or how “perfect” Instagram shows you life to be, you don’t have to settle for a life that is less than what your heart desires.

Often, we hang on to being miserable because we’re afraid of life being different, even if it could be better. And I can tell you that the woman I was at thirty-four is forever grateful to the woman I am at forty-seven. Because all that work is worth the results of this life.

Want to know the only thing standing between who you are today and who you desire to be? It’s you, sugarplum.  Which also means that the kind of life you want can be yours.

Are you ready to create it? Join me for Finally Love Your Life  - it begins September 29th   And I can show you HOW to do it in a way that fits YOUR needs.

I have shyed away from baking a lot this summer, but I couldn't resist the softening bananas last week and Banana Nut bread to begin my holiday baking. Taking something delicious when you go visiting, even if it's family, is always appreciated.

In a Bowl, cream together 1 stick of butter and 1 cup of Sugar Add 3 eggs, and mix well. Mush 3 Bananas, and continue to mix.

In a separate bowl, mix 1 cup of flour (I use whole wheat), 1 tsp of baking soda1 tsp of cinnamon, and 1/4 teaspoon of salt. Reserve two tablespoons of the dry mix, and gradually add to banana mixture.

Because two of JB's nephews cannot eat nuts, I no longer put nuts in our banana bread. However, if you do want to add them, take 1 1/2 cup of Walnuts and toss them in the reserved dry mix. (this will keep the walnuts from losing those healthy Omega 3 Fatty acids and keep the walnuts from burning!). Mix into bread mixture.

Now, pour into a loaf pan, and bake at 350 for about 45-55 minutes. Done when a toothpick comes out "clean".  IF you want to make muffins, they bake for about 22 minutes at the same temperature.

If you're wanting to get ahead on some holiday baking, simply wrap the bread in waxed paper and then place in a zip lock bag.  Then simply thaw the night before you want to serve it.  Baked goods like loafs and cakes keep for about 6 months.

Volume 9-Issue 19

September 14, 2019

Love Notes Published Every-Other-Saturday
Thank you, darling for the precious in-box space! 

See something you'd love to share?  I'd be honored if you forwarded this along to a friend.
Debra Smouse Love Note

About Debra

Debra Smouse is a writer, life coach, and Tarnished Southern Belle who is on a mission to help people create a daily life that is loving and nourishing.

A native Texan, she resides in Ohio with the Man of her Dreams. Connect with her on social media:
Instagram | Facebook Twitter.  
Finally Love Your Life
If happiness, ease, consistency, and grace are what you long for, I’m here to tell you that it’s nowhere near as hard as it seems.

Where you are on this journey is a part of the universal experience you must go through to find your own version of happily ever after. No one can do it for you, AND if you want to be happy, you must do it for yourself.

I know what it takes to walk this path, because I’ve done it. To help the women in my life, I pulled together my best tips, tricks, and life hacks that took me from barely hanging on to thriving in my own life.

Join me for 11-weeks to walk this transformational journey from who you are TODAY and who you really desire to be. We begin Sept. 29th.

Use code LoveMeIn2019  to save 25%.


I Loved Finally Love Your Life

I thought this was an extremely beneficial and well thought out class. The information was delivered in such a manner that there was no way I could "cheat" myself out of delving into the subject matter. Some days I was in the mood to listen to the audio, others, I enjoyed reading and rereading.

The worksheets were key as they helped me transition what I was reading into personalized knowledge of myself and an action plan. I appreciated the real guidance and suggestions that were given. For example, Debra didn't just say it is important to rest, she gave real examples of what rest looked like to her, and in turn, helped me think of ways I could put it into practice. It is a very interactive class and in each module I experienced at least one aha moment.

We are all in different phases of life, so certain modules will appeal more or less depending upon where you are at. I would highly recommend this course.

Years ago someone told me, "You would never drive a car without putting in gas, getting the oil changed, replacing the fluids, why on earth would you go through life without mental and physical checkups." This class is a great way to get the mental oil changed. I feel ready to go another 50,000 miles.

--Jeanette McGurk
30 Days to Clarity: Home Office

Your Home Office
Clearing Clutter &
Creating Systems for
Entrepreneurs and Others  Who Office At Home

Working from home isn’t always easy. There are distractions abound – neighbors, the postman, the laundry, Netflix…. So, don’t let the clutter add to your distractions.

Working from home can give you a sense of freedom you’ll never find in a cubicle. So the creation of systems will help you feel free because you’ll be supported by a structure that fits your needs.

It begins Monday, September 16th  

To save 30% = Use Code: nomoreclutter2019

Sign Up Here

Elizabeth Rago

Love & Affection

In a day and age where relationships are flat and a true connection to each other is a rare gem to be found, Debra’s genuine enthusiasm for life fuels your coaching experience. An ever-faithful ally and pillar of evolving ideas,

Debra approaches her clients with an intuitive ear, a foundation of love and sincerity, sprinkled with a touch of humor.

Elizabeth Rago
Modern Domestic Woman
Hunka Burning Love

A Year of Support & Accountability

My most popular coaching package as it allows us to spend 12 months together. We build trust and get to know each other intimately.

This allows you go go as wide - or deep - as your stage of life demands.

You choose the number of sessions that fit your lifestyle (and budget) and we’ll create an amazing year together for a life you love.

Learn More or book a discovery session to see if we're a good fit.

Unbelievable Difference

Working with Deb for just a few months has made an unbelievable difference in my life.

With her encouragement, I made major progress on clearing the clutter in my physical life as well as in my emotional life, which paved the way toward creating a new vision for the life I want to live now.

Deb has an easy conversational style, rational down-to earth wisdom, and a warm sense of humor.

She got right to the heart of the things holding me back from living my best life, and has given me sound principles and practices I can carry forward into the future.

For the first time in a long time I feel excited about my life, and I have Deb to thank for that!

-Becca Rowan, Author

Clear Your Mind

Want to know how to clear your head?

One of the biggest challenges to loving my life is my own thoughts. One moment, I’m feeling on top of the world and then suddenly feel overwhelmed, thanks to swirling thoughts that soon become brain clutter.

Read  ==> Here’s How To Clear Your Mind When You’re Stressed To The Max

A Joy

Working with Debra is a joy.

She inspires me, she supports me, and she gives me direction so I can identify my needs and my wants. But she doesn’t stop there. Not only does she assist me in laying the foundation, but she gives me the tools to actually achieve the life I desire. This is an ongoing process, not a quick fix. And it takes practice.

–Susan Mushkin

Copyright © 2019 Debra Smouse - Create a Life You Love, All rights reserved.

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