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A tough news week...
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“For last year's words
belong to last year's language
and next year's words
await another voice.”
---TS Eliot

 

Happy Saturday and Happy New Year, <<Name>> ! We are easing into 2019. And my first official day of work won't be until Last Sunset of 2018January 14th. JB's mother is a New Year's Eve baby and we've started the tradition of spending time together with his family to ring in the New Year.

(This was the last Sunset of 2018)

It can be overwhelming for me, to be honest. In an average week, the only folks I see are JB, my neighbors, and the folks at the grocery store. That's not a lot of folks.

To be part of a 20 person dinner is, well, loud.

There are a half-dozen conversations happening at once. A lot of food and drinks are consumed. Lots of card games are played..And we get to spend time with the little ones, which is always a blast. When you aren't around little ones every day, you just forget how funny they are.

The downside of this gathering is being away from home on January 1st.

In the past, I've loved having the full day to be quiet. To reflect a bit more on what's behind me and what I desire for the coming 12 months of a bright and shiny new year. I also like to follow the tradition of including your biggest desires for MORE into the day. Want to write a book? Then write a paragraph of it on January 1st. Want to get in shape? Go for a walk. on New Year's Day.

On January 1st, though, I was making breakfast for 9 (the contingent that stayed at our Condo after Cake and Fireworks). And I was silently laughing as I listened to the negotiations between an 8 year old and his father about a million little things. And after some play time in the pool and at the beach, there was another dinner for 20 to attend.

Certainly not quiet reflection.

Yet, I'm not complaining. JB doesn't get as much time with his family as he'd like. And this is a rare opportunity to spend extended time with everyone. And I have to confess there is something magical and nourishing about making food for so many people.

So, it's simply a part of the new normal for New Year's.

What that means, though, is a shift in mindset.

Though I believe that every day presents the opportunity to start fresh, everywhere you turn, you're bombarded with NEW YEAR, NEW YOU. And subconsciously, we want to be a part of that, right?

So, I'm working on my thinking. And reminding myself that just because other coaches are doing big launches and sales to ride that energetic wave, I don't have to do it, too. And that I'm not "missing out". That if someone needs to work with me in the coming year, they will find their way to me at the right time.

So, I'm taking a big deep breath. And reminding myself to have some patience. To lean into Grace.

I've done a little work here and there. (Like changing out those photos) And am going to remind myself that officially starting the year on January 14th is a fabulous thing.

That gives us time to get home, do laundry, and have a relaxing re-entry into being back home. In the QUIET. And every little thing will be just right and the way it needs to unfold.

So tell me, darling: What about YOU?  Does the New Year/New You stuff excite you? Or stress you out? How do you like to begin the New Year? What would choosing to start your year on a different date look and feel like?

And what mindsets do you need to shift in this coming year? 
Are you in need of talking through these things? What are your priorities for the first quarter of 2019? What's something you could do well, however, getting some help would allow you to really take it to the next level?

Remember that I'm just an email away. I love hearing your stories and helping you find the resources you need to create a life you love.

With so much love...........





PS -I am taking ONE or Two new clients this Winter. Just reply to this email if you want to set up a time to chat sometime after Jan. 14th.

PSS - Clutter Busting begins TOMORROW!  If you want to begin 2019 by decluttering your home, join me by signing up here.

From the blog: You Can Love Your Life and Still Desire More.  More times than I care to count, I’ve been told how lucky I am to have such a good life. And trust me, I know how incredibly blessed I am. I’m in a great relationship, love my work, and am overall a happy gal. Yet, what gives me pause is the tone used. There’s this underlying message that I should be satisfied with my life. And I’m here to tell you, sugarplum, that you can love your life. And still desire MORE.

Though you may intellectually understand this, I share it because I’ve had to remind myself that it’s true. Because the moment someone utters “You’re so lucky” or “Well, that must be nice”? A part of me tries to shrink. To become smaller and unnoticed. Yes, that inner people-pleaser in me becomes afraid that the other person thinks I’m a spoiled brat. Or full of myself.

That implication that I should simply settle for this beautiful life I have? It has a double edged meaning to it: how dare I desire even more!

So, let me repeat myself. Darling, you can love your life. And still want something more for yourself and your life.

When it comes to curating a life you love, I’m a big fan of gratitude. Being grateful for your blessings and lessons helps re-wire your brain to think more positively. But that doesn’t mean that wanting more is being ungrateful for what you have.

And in fact, sometimes I think that achieving our goals invites our soul to grow even more. To achieve more. And experience more. Maybe even shoot for a goal so big that we are sure to make some mistakes or fails along the way.

Because we are wired for connection, when someone criticizes our choices, we are tempted to stunt our own growth.

On the flip side of that, though, is fear and self-sabotage.

There’s that fear that desiring more means that “the other shoe will drop”, and not only will you not get what you longed for? You’ll screw up the delicate balance of life. And end up no longer liking it, let alone loving your life.

Fear will tell you that you desires aren’t practical. Or that you’ll never be as accomplished as others (oh, that old comparison!)

And the thing is, because humans are wired for connection, we often tamp down the desire to be bigger and bolder. Because, what if people don’t like us? What if they withdraw their affection? (Hint: Anyone who withdraws their affection from you isn’t worthy of your time.)

Yet, the voices of fear and self-sabotage will continue to speak loudly. Insisting that you should just be happy. Can you love your life as it is without wanting to change it? That, my dear, is the voice of fear.

Don’t give into fear, my dear. You can love your life. And still desire more.

Here are a few specific reminders:


You can have a healthy, happy relationship.

And, you can desire to have a stronger partnership. A happy relationship doesn’t mean that you allow the relationship to stagnate. It doesn’t mean you don’t make an effort to understand each other. To be intimate and stay connected by conversation, fun, and sex. Don’t allow the fear of desiring more to keep you from loving your life. And your relationship.

You can do work that really lights you from within.

And, you can desire to be more successful. Just because you love your work doesn’t mean you don’t want to have an even better career. Make those plans and grow yourself as a professional. And human being.

You can love your life and yourself.

You can accept your body for all it’s perfections and imperfections. And still desire to drop a few pounds. Or get in better shape. Or want to get Botox or a facelift or a tummy tuck. It’s your body, my dear. And loving yourself doesn’t exclude you from wanting to change or shift something.

You can love being a mom.

And still want to be more than just a mom. You can love your life and your kids. And want to make your mark on the world as a woman, not just a mom. Parenting is rewarding and challenging. And yes, you may excel at it. But that doesn’t have to pigeon-hole you into the “Only a Mom” role.

You can love your life and your home.

And still desire to travel. Or move to a bigger (or smaller) house. And you can love where you are, and want to move across the country. Or to a different country. You can appreciate the simple pleasures of life. And still desire grand things and grander adventures.

You can love everything about your life.

And still follow those strings of desire. Because you know that there is more to experience. More to be. And things to create.

What I’ve learned is this: humans are built to follow the threads of their desires.

Do not allow the little voices of fear to stop you from pursuing more. Don’t allow the judgemental voices of others to keep you from both loving your life and growing it. For all that is holy, remind yourself that you are a beloved Child of God and deserve a nourishing life. You can love your life, my darling. And yes, you can still deeply desire for even more.

Life, my dear, is indeed short. You can love your life as it is right now. And still want to pursue something more. So, dive into your desires. Make grand plans. And understand that you can love your life now. And find ways to love it even more.

Last week I shared a traditional breakfast casserole with hash browns and sausage that you make in the crock pot.  I love that recipe, yet, I have also been cutting back on overall carbs as we move into the New Year. So, if you made a goal (or resolution) to eat healthier in 2019 consider this breakfast casserole that's gluten-free, dairy-free, and potato free.

Preheat your oven to 350.

Begin with TWO CUPS of cooked meat. I used already seasoned ground beef, but I would happily substitute ground pork. If you aren't watching gluten or sugars, you can use sausage, ham, or even diced chicken.

Next, you'll need TWO CUPS of veggies. I used a cup of diced onions and alternate between a cup of one of the following: diced bell peppers (I prefer any color except green, one cup of canned tomatoes, or a cup of broccoli.

In a large skillet or Dutch Oven, saute the veggies in olive oil until they begin to get tender. Add your cooked meat and combine well.  I added some additional seasonings: a little Kosher Salt, some dried Italian Seasonings, and several grinds of fresh pepper.

Then add a large container ( 10+ ounces) of Baby Spinach.  You can also use Kale or Swiss Chard. Combine into meat and veggie mixture, cover and allow to wilt (about 3 minutes).



Spray a 13 x 9 Baking Dish with Pam and pour the meat/veggie/spinach mixture into the dish.

Beat 8 large eggs with a whisk or fork until they are super frothy. Pour the eggs over the meat/veggie/spinach mixture.  Note: if the eggs don't completely cover, you may need to beat a couple of more eggs - because egg volume varies.  Because you aren't using cream (or other dairy product) - the result will be consistent even if you have to add more eggs.

Season top of casserole with salt, pepper, or herbs to taste.  Bake for 25 to 35 minutes, until an inserted knife comes out "clean".



You can serve right away...or do as I did: allow it to cool, cover and refrigerate. Then, warm up the entire casserole in the oven for about 10 minutes, or microwave individual slices.

This recipe is easily halved.  You can use whatever veggies you have around (a good way to use up leftovers or stuff that's about to go bad). This makes an easy dinner for breakfast option or lunch, too.  It will keep in the fridge for up to three days.

Volume 9 -Issue 01

January 05, 2019

Love Notes Published Every-Other-Saturday
 
Thank you, darling for the precious in-box space! 

See something you'd love to share?  I'd be honored if you forwarded this along to a friend.

About Debra


Debra Smouse is a writer, life coach, and Tarnished Southern Belle who is on a mission to help people create a daily life that is loving and nourishing.

A native Texan, she resides in Ohio with the Man of her Dreams. Connect with her on social media:
Instagram | Facebook Twitter.

Unbelievable Difference

Working with Deb for just a few months has made an unbelievable difference in my life.

With her encouragement, I made major progress on clearing the clutter in my physical life as well as in my emotional life, which paved the way toward creating a new vision for the life I want to live now.

Deb has an easy conversational style, rational down-to earth wisdom, and a warm sense of humor.

She got right to the heart of the things holding me back from living my best life, and has given me sound principles and practices I can carry forward into the future.

For the first time in a long time I feel excited about my life, and I have Deb to thank for that!

-Becca Rowan, Author

Love Yourself & Track Your Goals

I believe that if you were to really get to know all the sides of someone, you couldn’t help but fall in love with them.

What if YOU were that person?

Become Besotted. With Yourself. With Your Life.

Become Besotted will assist you in writing your story, a month at a time. An opportunity to get to know all sides of yourself and fall in love.

Become Besotted will also help you explore your dreams and desires. It will serve you in monitoring your victories and shedding what isn’t serving you.

You receive an in-depth questionnaire and 12 months to unfold your story and fall in love...

Purchase here.

You Won't Be Sorry

But the rest, the rest being with Deb’s counsel, has been an interesting, innovating, expanding chapter in my life as a woman, a spouse, a creative artist. My spouse and I have always had what I considered an excellent life together – I did not anticipate an even better and the more intimate relationship that we now find ourselves living into every day.

I’m no slouch in the confidence category but Deb has helped me face those teeny cracks of vulnerability that I sheltered, having helped me prosper mentally and physically at this stage of my life. My creative aspirations are blooming with no end in sight – LOTS more growth ahead for me.

I highly recommend a course with Deb or what she might call a non-course – that’s the arrangement we have now. Personal coaching on a regular basis – touching base on one’s own hiccups, one’s own dimension of daily life, whether it’s exercise, creative habits and/or reaching the next plateau or higher in all of the newness that still continues to unfold for me.

I highly recommend Deb’s methods and courses! You won’t be sorry you signed on with Deb as your super-person sidekick!

Dianna Woolley, Artist

Also in the Blog


Have you gotten stuck in the trap of comparing your life to strangers on the internet?

Click here to read==>
Honestly Declare "I Will Love My Life" by Ending the Comparison Game

A Joy


Working with Debra is a joy.

She inspires me, she supports me, and she gives me direction so I can identify my needs and my wants. But she doesn’t stop there. Not only does she assist me in laying the foundation, but she gives me the tools to actually achieve the life I desire. This is an ongoing process, not a quick fix. And it takes practice.

If I veer off my intended path, Debra has given me the structure, along with the tools to get back on track. Since working with Debra, my life flows more smoothly, I know where I’m heading and I know how to get there.

I feel better about myself and my life. I look forward to each day as an adventure!

–Susan Mushkin

Clear Clutter BEGINS TOMORROW!


One of the biggest lessons I have learned is that you cannot welcome new things into your life if you don’t release some of the old stuff. You need to begin to purge things from your life.

Join me for 30 Days of Fall Cleaning and Clearing Clutter beginning Sunday, January 06, 2019

Just in time to get your home in order before the holidays!

Gratitude


Your advice has always been spot on…….from helping me see how important it is to be thankful for my blessings to helping me remove physical and emotional clutter from my life. I am actually the most grateful for the times when you have spoken the truth in love and been honest with me when I wanted to continue to delude myself. Without those wise words, I would have continued to lie to myself and not had the breakthroughs I have experienced.

I’m not all I want to be yet but I would have ever found my path had I not met and worked with you. Thank you for your efforts in helping me find my life. I am forever in your debt.

~Basil Human, Engineer, Chief Operating Officer, Writer

A Year of Support & Accountability

My most popular coaching package as it allows us to spend 12 months together. We build trust and get to know each other intimately.

This allows you go go as wide - or deep - as your stage of life demands.

You choose the number of sessions that fit your lifestyle (and budget) and we’ll create an amazing year together for a life you love.

Learn More or Email me for a complimentary chat to see if we are a good fit.

Supportive


Debra.  Your blogs and columns and coaching advice always seem supportive and like they’re coming from a place of love.

~Melissa Bartell, Word Ninja.  Bathtub Mermaid

Also from the Blog

HOW to love your life again when things go a little crazy or sideways.

Read ==> How to Stop Feeling Burned Out and Love Your Life Again
 
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Copyright © 2019 Debra Smouse - Create a Life You Love, All rights reserved.


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