From the blog: Self-Awareness: The Key to Creating a Life You Love. It’s easy to say you desire to create a daily life you love, yet doing so often leaves folks feeling challenged around what they really desire. That challenge lies in the reality that we tend to live our lives on the surface, lost in our busyness and devoting our time to responsibilities. This leaves little time for the self-awareness, a process needed for diving into your heart and discovering what you most need for happiness and satisfaction.
The truth though is that the level of satisfaction around your life and your overall sense of happiness is fueled by how well you know yourself. Even if you aren’t actively seeking more self-awareness, your daily life is actually dictated by and informed by how well you do know yourself and your desires.
I’m not a fan of constant overlong navel gazing and excruciating self-analysis, because that can lend to the continued pursuit of perfection. But I can’t deny that your level of self-awareness will impact the choices you make. I’m talking both big and little choices, from how willing you are to pursue your goals, to how open to love and connection your will be, and how you respond to every up and down.
Confidence and happiness will stem from how well you know yourself.
Who, frankly, has time for diving into self-awareness?
Yet, I know that many of the working pieces of your life feel dictated by your responsibilities, alarm clocks, and a growing list of have-to-dos. Stress, the demands of others, and overall busyness mean little downtime in your life. And when you have a smidgen of downtime – those fleeing moments of time to yourself – there’s always the lurking demands of text messages, emails, Facebook, Neflix, and more. And that’s not counting the real need to actually relax and spend some time pursuing a hobby or some sort of play.
No one has that kind of free time these days. But frankly, everyone can find a little time to gaze in the mirror and learn more about the person staring back at them.
I know that’s a bit of a oxymoron, yet I know from years of coaching and living my own life, the path to creating the kind of daily life you desire – and deserve – to live stems from carving out a bit of time to get to know the most important person in your life: yourself.
Because if you don’t find a way to dive into your own self-awareness, how can you answer those seemingly simple questions like:
- What do I want?
- Am I happy?
- What am I most passionate about?
- What would make my life feel more nourished?
Chances are, you have a quick response to all those big life questions. Yet, if you took a few moments to pause and check-in with your heart, you likely know that there is a deeper answer.
Is an epic quest the answer to real self-awareness?
I’m sure you’ve read a book or seen a movie where the main character goes on an epic journey to find themselves. It seems so glamorous, and despite some angst by that hero/heroine in the middle of the story, everything seems to draw to a happily ever after by the end. Purpose, passion, and deepest desires – often along with the perfect partner or job – arrive.
So, maybe you’re waiting to find yourself when you get time to take that epic dream trip to Paris or India or hiking through the wilderness. I can promise you that if you’re waiting for that magical trip so that the journey of self-awareness will be “easier” or more meaningful, then darling, you are wasting what precious time you have now. Because if you don’t think you have time to discover who you are because your life is so “busy” now, then I can promise you’ll likely never find the time to go on that epic adventure.
The time to live the kind of life you desire is now. Please don’t continue to waste the precious time and energy for living your life to the fullest by waiting for the perfect circumstances.
The answers aren’t hidden somewhere out there, though I admit that travel reveals who we are to ourselves. The answers also don’t depend on reading a bunch of self-help books or giving away everything you own or meditating for hours a day. Yes, all of these actions – meditation, clearing needless clutter, and books – can help you with the process, but there is a simpler way.
The best way I know to dig into that self-awareness of who you are and what you most desire is to dip your toes into the depths of yourself through an inquiry process. Sounds ominous in that way, but the core of the inquiry process is posing some bold, open-ended, and probing questions and answering them honestly.
Most of us tend to avoid vulnerability and tell ourselves a few little white lies. Yet, if I were to ask you how you can really get to know someone else, you’d say spending time with them, observing their habits, asking them questions, and listening to their answers. Answers that you hope are deeply honest.
The same goes for you.
You have to be willing to be vulnerable and honest with yourself – to gaze into the mirror and see you for how you really are.
I know from research – and experience – that vulnerability allows you to form a stronger connection with others and yourself.
And let’s not forget that other thing: honesty. It’s critical that you are honest with yourself. Even if you think your answers may sound selfish or greedy or materialistic, they aren’t. Because they are your truth.
“The truth will set you free. But first, it will piss you off”
The answers you discover in your quest for self-awareness may make you angry, uncomfortable, or afraid. This is normal. This is why it’s important to be gentle. Just note, however, that it’s impossible to create the kind of lasting change you deeply desire without knowing exactly where you stand.
Click here to read more - including How to Create a Mini-Retreat for Self-Awareness AND 30 Questions to help you get started ==>
Remember that you’re in charge of your life, so it may be that a series of three or five mini-sessions and you discover that it’s time to take a break of a few weeks or even months from your self-awareness experiment. This gives you a breather – and an opportunity to begin taking some action around what you’ve discovered you desire to shift in your world.
Know that you are always growing and evolving. This process of inquiry for self-awareness is always within reach whenever you feel stuck, come up against some challenges, or simply desire to love your life more. Yes, I know that this may feel indulgent, but you, my darling, are worth getting to know.