Volume 18, No. 24                     December 19, 2013
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The Liberator Online

for everyone who loves Liberty
Published by The Advocates for Self-Government
"The Advocates for Self-Government is one of 
the freedom movement's leading organizations."
— Ron Paul, The Congressional Record, June 30, 2010
WELCOME to the Liberator Online!

In This Issue

* It's a Libertarian Christmas!

* Will the Feds Bust Santa Claus?
* VIDEO: "I Saw Daddy Pat Down Santa Claus" (A Very TSA Christmas Song)
* VIDEO: New Twist on a Christmas Classic: "The NSA is Coming to Town"
* How the Government Stole Christmas
THEY SAID IT: Richard Lamm's famous quote on Christmas and deficits.... There's a government Santa, and he steals other kids' toys.... Is Santa Claus a Democrat, a Republican, or.... David Letterman: It's a TSA Christmas....

PERSUASION POWER POINT #362 by Michael Cloud
Make Your Christmas Joyous — and Libertarian

* Upcoming: libertarian communication workshops
* FREE OPH KITS for libertarian student groups!
* Join the Advocates on Twitter
* Join the Advocates on Facebook
* 2014 Freedom Cruises
Our Holiday Gift to You — 30% Off EVERYTHING!

From now through the end of the year, Liberator Online readers can take 30% off EVERYTHING IN OUR ONLINE STORE!
All you have to do to get your special Liberator Online reader 30% discount is to use this coupon number at checkout: DEC2013.
Follow us....

President's Corner

by Sharon Harris

It's a Libertarian Christmas!

Dear friend,
Happy Holidays! And welcome to our annual Christmas issue. 

We've got some special Christmas treats for you. 

First up: "Will the Feds Bust Santa Claus?" This has become a libertarian Christmas classic. It was written several years ago as a Libertarian Party press release by former LP Press Secretary and Advocates friend and supporter George Getz. Thank you once again, George! We love it. 

Then not one, but TWO hilarious and timely Christmas videos — share them with everyone! 

That's followed by a report by Americans for Tax Reform on just how much the government is adding to the cost of your Christmas this year. You'll be shocked. 

All of these are timely and fun to forward to friends. 

And there's more. 

We have some short humorous quotes about Christmas and politics, from some of the funniest minds in America. 

Michael Cloud suggests some ways you can make this Christmas a libertarian one. (Hint: these ideas are good year-round!) 

And finally, a Liberator Online holiday tradition since our very first year: our annual Christmas poem — loved by some, loathed by others, complete with awkward rhymes and exceedingly eccentric rhythms. Read it if you dare! 

* * * 

When I count my blessings, the tens of thousands of great people who read this publication are high on that list.

Thank you for being a Liberator Online reader — one of the very important people who understand how vital it is to build a worldwide movement dedicated to individual liberty, abundance, and peace.

* * *

Our Holiday Gift to You — 30% Off EVERYTHING!

From now through the end of the year, Liberator Online readers can take 30% off EVERYTHING IN OUR ONLINE STORE!
All you have to do to get your special Liberator Online reader 30% discount is to use this coupon number at checkout: DEC2013.

* * *

A Special Request for Your End-of-Year Support

As Congressman Ron Paul indicates in his quote at the top of this issue, every day the Advocates performs vital work for liberty — work no other organization does. Work that benefits the entire liberty movement. 

I've written extensively about our achievements this year in my annual End-of-Year Report. Please take a few minutes to read it. I think you'll find it exciting and inspiring.

I'm proud of what we accomplished in 2013, and I am excited about our plans for an even more successful year in 2014 — which I'll be sharing with you soon. 

I especially hope this End-of-Year Report will inspire you to contribute to see that this great work continues and expands.

Please note: We have great thank-you gifts reserved for you if you're able to donate to our work — including the very last stock of one of the most highly-praised libertarian books of the past three decades. 

And remember: your donation is tax-deductible in the U.S.  

Thank you!
Yours for Liberty,


* * *
The purpose of the Liberator Online is to build a stronger movement for liberty. We do this by providing information about the libertarian movement and how to best communicate the ideas of liberty. Thank you for being a part of this!

Learn more about the Advocates and our work for liberty.

Learn more about libertarianism â€“ the philosophy of liberty.

— Sharon Harris, President | Email

“The triumph of the human spirit over evil and oppression.”
That’s how an Amazon reviewer describes A Dream of Daring, Gen LaGreca’s epic new novel.
In the South before the Civil War, a visionary planter’s radical ideas and breakthrough invention threaten the townspeople’s privileged way of life, based on slavery and power. Tensions mount when his device is stolen and a respected community patriarch is murdered.
Ingenious and original, A Dream of Daring unfolds a sweeping story of secrets, lies, and forbidden romance. It’s an irresistible page-turner, packed with suspense and surprising plot twists. The ideas and themes are directly relevant to today’s struggle for freedom.
This inspiring future libertarian classic is available in paperback and e-book at Amazon, here.

Intellectual Ammunition

by James W. Harris

— Special News Bulletin â€”

Will the Feds Bust Santa Claus?

(Editor's Note: George Getz wrote "Will the Feds Bust Santa Claus?" in 1999, when he was Libertarian Party Communications Director. Feel free to forward to friends!)

When Santa Claus comes to town, he'd better watch out — because the federal government may be making a list of his crimes (and checking it twice).

"Hark the federal agents sing, Santa is guilty of nearly everything," said former Libertarian Party press secretary George Getz. "The feds know when Santa's been bad or good — and he's been bad, for goodness sakes."

Does Santa belong in the slammer? Instead of stuffing stockings, should he be making license plates?

Yes, said Getz, if he's held to the same standards as a typical American.

For example:

* Every December 25, the illegal immigrant known as Santa Claus crosses the border into the United States without a passport. He carries concealed contraband, which he sneaks into the country in order to avoid inspection by the U.S. Customs Service. And just what's in all those brightly colored packages tied up with ribbons, anyway? The Drug Czar and Homeland Security want to know.

* Look at how this international fugitive gets around: Santa flies in a custom-built sleigh that hasn't been approved by the FAA. He never files a flight plan. He has no pilot's license. In the dark of night, he rides the skies with just a tiny bioluminescent red light to guide him — a clear violation of traffic safety regulations.

* Pulling Santa's sleigh: Eight tiny reindeer, a federally protected species being put to hard labor. None of these reindeer have their required shots, and Santa's never bothered to get these genetically-engineered animals registered and licensed. It's no wonder: He keeps them penned outside his workplace in a clear violation of zoning laws.

* But Crooked Claus the Conniving Capitalist harms more than just animals — he's hurting hard-working American laborers, too. Isn't Santa's Workshop really Santa's Sweatshop, where his non-union employees don't make minimum wage and get no holiday pay? Add the fact that OSHA has never inspected the place, and you have a Third-World elf-exploitation operation that only Kathy Lee Gifford could love.

* No wonder Santa is able to maintain his monopoly over the toy distribution industry: He's cornered the Christmas gift market. Santa dares to give away his products for free in a sinister attempt to crush all competition — just like Microsoft's Internet Explorer. Antitrust Lawsuit Memo to the feds: Is Santa Claus the Bill Gates of Christmas?

The bottom line, said Getz: "It might be tough sledding for Jolly St. Nick this Christmas if the government decides to prosecute him.

"We're just surprised it hasn't already happened. After all, Santa Claus is everything that politicians aren't: He's popular, reliable, and gives us something for nothing every December 25th — instead of taking our money every April 15th."

VIDEO: "I Saw Daddy Pat Down Santa Claus" (A Very TSA Christmas Song) 

Hilarious! See what happens when the holiday season's most frequent flier meets... the TSA!

"I Saw Daddy Pat Down Santa Claus" is written and performed by the renowned comedian Remy, produced by Meredith Bragg, and made available by our friends at Reason TV. 

A little over one minute long.

VIDEO: New Twist on a Christmas Classic: "The NSA is Coming to Town"

Yeah, they're making a list and checking it... well, we don't know how many times. But ONCE is too many! 

This hilarious (and creepy) song and video from the ACLU is a must-see and a great online share. 

Sample lyrics: 

You better watch out,
You better not Skype,
You better log out,
Yeah you better not type,
The NSA is coming to town.

You're making a list,
They're checking it twice;
They're watching almost every electronic device,
The NSA is coming to town...

.....and more. The accompanying video shows NSA agents in Santa suits, tracking, harassing, recording, and surveilling ordinary innocent citizens — which is what they do every day, of course. Except for the Santa suits (to the best of our knowledge). 

The video ends with an appeal to reel in the security state. Now THAT'S a present we'd like to see under our tree!

How the Government Stole Christmas

Forget the Grinch — it's the government that's stealing Christmas.

So reports Americans for Tax Reform, a non-profit group that works for lower taxes and smaller government. (The following article is based on their 2011 report.)

The holidays are supposed to be a season for giving and spending time with loved ones. However, Uncle Sam has forced taxpayers to add him and his greedy local and state relatives to their gift list. Of an identified $10.72 billion of holiday spending, an incredible 43.36 percent is due to government taxes, fees, and other costs.

If you are one of the 93 percent of holiday revelers traveling this season, you will pay $69.65 in gas taxes for the average $152.47 round-trip excursion — 45.68 percent of the cost of the trip. Taking a rental is another convenient option, but 38.77 percent of your car's rental cost is due to taxation, particularly from state and local governments.

Choose to fly to visit friends and family and 42.47 percent of your trip is made up of government costs. If you retreat from your in-laws to a hotel, remember that 39.39 percent of the cost of your stay is funneled back to the government. In Christmas 2011, the government stuffed its stocking with $3.79 billion in traveling taxes.

Holiday revelers enjoy an estimated $992 million in alcoholic beverages to celebrate the season. Savor your next mug of eggnog, because 56.31 percent of the price is taxes. Government guzzles 44.33 percent of your seasonal beer and drives up the price of your glass of wine at Christmas dinner by 32.77 percent. Sipping a soft drink won't let you escape frosty government fees — 27.98 percent, or $61 million in taxes, is attached to the cost of soda.

When Santa comes down the chimney this year, he'll have to save room in his sack for Uncle Sam's gifts. Government gets $21 billion of a cumulative $69.1 billion spent on presents, consuming nearly a third of Christmas gift-giving.

All told, the government collects around $26 billion in new revenues over the holiday season.

That's naughty — and definitely not nice!       

(Please note: This excellent and entertaining report was prepared in 2011 by ATR. We deleted a section referring to a proposed Obama Christmas tree tax, which is to our knowledge no longer relevant. When sharing this information with friends and family, just add "A couple of years ago, Americans for Tax Reform found..." in case some of these figures have since changed. To see if ATR has updated this report since we published this issue, visit their website.)
* * * * * * * *
Intellectual Ammunition is written by Liberator Online editor James W. Harris. His articles have appeared in numerous magazines and newspapers, and he has been a Finalist for the Mencken Awards, given by the Free Press Association for "Outstanding Journalism in Support of Liberty."

Like this issue? Forward it to a friend!

Forward to Friend

CHRISTMAS AND DEFICITS:  "Christmas is a time when kids tell Santa what they want and adults pay for it. Deficits are when adults tell the government what they want and their kids pay for it." — Richard Lamm, former Governor of Colorado.

IS SANTA CLAUS A DEMOCRAT, REPUBLICAN, OR... "If Santa Claus were a Democrat, his elves wouldn't make toys. They'd loot them from rich kids and toy stores. If Santa were a Republican, he'd deport all the elves back to Middle Earth. So Santa must be a Libertarian." — online comment by "gatman7," responding to an article at discussing whether Santa is a Democrat or Republican, December 11, 2012.

THE GOV'T SANTA STEALS TOYS: "Too many adults treat government the way kids treat Santa. But government is not magic. ... Many adults want government to cover everything under Santa’s flying sleigh. Their wish lists say, 'subsidize my retirement, my big house, a year’s worth of unemployment, my medicine, my college loans, my electric car, my auto company, my union, my bank, my bad decisions in general, and my ethanol and solar companies.'  But unlike Santa’s bottomless bag of toys, every subsidy government gives to someone must first be taken from someone else. For every happy kid there is another whose toy was ripped from his hands." — Joseph G. Lehman, "Government as Santa," op-ed, The Mackinac Center,  Dec. 25, 2012. 
A TSA CHRISTMAS: "It's so cold that the security guys at the airports are putting their hands in their own pants." — David Letterman, Dec. 7, 2010.

Persuasion Power Point #362

by Michael Cloud


Make Your Christmas Joyous — and Libertarian

Would it take a miracle to win your family or friends to libertarianism?

Christmas is the season of miracles. And you just might cause one by giving your loved one stimulating and fun libertarian gifts this Christmas.

Does your family member or friend like movies? Why not buy him a DVD of an entertaining movie with a libertarian theme: "The Americanization of Emily" or "The Day the Earth Stood Still" (the 1950s original) or — if you're a practicing capitalist — "Atlas Shrugged, The Movie" Parts 1 and 2, and "Other People's Money."

Unsure of which movie to select? Buy yourself "Miss Liberty's Guide to Film and Video" from the Advocates this year. It contains over 250 reviews of films that deal with subjects such as free speech, the draft, drug laws, taxation, regulation, sexual liberty, immigration, and many more.

Does your sister or brother like fiction? Buy them Give Me Liberty edited by Martin Greenberg and Mark Tier. This collection of libertarian short stories might jump-start a lifetime love affair with liberty. Have them read And Then There Were None by Eric Frank Russell first. You haven't read it? Get yourself a copy, too.

Or try these libertarian classics:

* The Moon Is A Harsh Mistress by Robert Heinlein.
* Atlas Shrugged by Ayn Rand.
* The Last War (Ferret Chronicles) by Richard Bach.

Do they prefer non-fiction books?

* How I Found Freedom In an Unfree World by Harry Browne can shatter their prejudices and open their minds. It's available as an ebook at

* Why Government Doesn't Work and The Great Libertarian Offer by Harry Browne are simple and direct, engaging and readable books. They make great presents — and you CAN give YOURSELF a Christmas present, too. Also available at the Harry Browne link above.

* Libertarianism in One Lesson by David Bergland. A short and elegant read, hailed by many critics as "the best short guide to libertarianism available."

* Healing Our World by Dr. Mary Ruwart. Do you have progressives or New Agers in your life? This book really connects with them.

* Secrets of Libertarian Persuasion by Michael Cloud. This is the gift that keeps giving the gift of liberty. It will multiply the effectiveness of every libertarian conversation. This is the perfect gift for the libertarians in your life. Including you. Available from the Advocates.

* One suggested CD set: "Personal Responsibility is the Price of Liberty," a 2-CD set that makes a powerful case for the libertarian concept of individual responsibility. Many people who are NOT receptive and responsive to our message of individual liberty open their hearts and minds to personal responsibility.

These are a few popular libertarian Christmas gifts. The Advocates has many more at their Liberty Store, and until the end of the year, they're available at a huge 30% discount! See editor's note at the end of this column.

These are Christmas gifts that may well make a difference in your brother's or sister's or friend's life.

Christmas gifts they will cherish for years to come.

Make this season one of glad tidings and hope for your loved ones.

Make their Christmas joyous — and libertarian!

EDITOR'S NOTE: All Advocates products mentioned by Michael in this column are discounted 30% now through the end of the year — our holiday gift to you! Just visit our Liberty Store and use this special coupon code at checkout: DEC2013.

* * * * * * * *
Michael Cloud's latest book Unlocking More Secrets of Libertarian Persuasion is available exclusively from the Advocates, along with his acclaimed earlier book Secrets of Libertarian Persuasion.

In 2000, Michael was honored with the Thomas Paine Award as the Most Persuasive Libertarian Communicator in America.
Unlocking More Secrets of Libertarian Persuasion
Now 30% OFF!


Our Holiday Gift to You — 30% Off EVERYTHING!

From now through the end of the year, Liberator Online readers can take 30% off EVERYTHING IN OUR ONLINE STORE!
All you have to do to get your special Liberator Online reader 30% discount is to use this coupon number at checkout: DEC2013.
Advocates Annual Christmas Poem

"A Liberty Christmas..."

'Twas the night before Christmas,
And all through the land
Libertarians dreamed of the ideals of
Rothbard, Mises and Rand.

Enchanted by a vision of worldwide liberty,
Many yearned for better ways to help their neighbors see
The great benefits that would come if they'd only embrace
A philosophy of freedom for all the human race.

At our home the stockings and decorations were up,
We'd left Santa some cookies and milk in a cup.
The children were nestled all snug in their beds
While dreams of Christmas played in their heads.

I in my Advocates T-shirt,  and Mom in her Self-Governor's Cap,
Had just settled down for a long winter's nap,
When outside the window there arose such a clatter
That I leapt from my bed to see what the heck was the matter!

Through the window I saw an astonishing sight
That any other time would have given me a fright!
A sleigh pulled by reindeer flying so quick,
And driven by no less than — Jolly Old St. Nick!

As he soared through the air, heading straight to my abode,
I saw the sled carried a tremendous load
Of packages, treasures, treats and toys —
Gifts for all good men, women, girls and boys!

Fast as a jet, right toward me they came!
And I heard Old St. Nick call each reindeer by name:
"Now Tolerance! Now Free Enterprise! Now Liberty!
Onward Peace, and Free Speech, and Prosperity!"

When I heard those names I realized with a start:
"Hey, Santa's one of us — at the top of the Nolan Chart!"

I had always admired this very special man,
Who flew 'round the world without posting an FAA flight plan,
Who crossed national borders with impunity each year,
And never registered his team with the U.S. Department of Reindeer.

Who laughed at licenses and permits and made his own route,
And ran a safe happy workshop far from OSHA's prying snout.
Who lived independent and state-free at the icy North Pole,
Far away from taxes, regulations and the dole.

So I tiptoed downstairs to peep into the den,
To steal a sight of this jolly old gentleman
Who brought such joy to millions in so many lands,
To see him in action — alive, first-hand!

I heard the sleigh touch lightly on the roof,
Strange noises in my chimney and then — POOF!
There was Santa standing boldly beside our Christmas tree,
In his famous red suit — an awesome sight to see!

He took a bite of our cookies and said, "Hmmmm — not bad!"
Then wrote a quick note thanking our youngest lad.
Then he reached down into the bulging bag at his side,
And spoke aloud as he brought out gifts from inside:

"Here's a new computer for Johnny, and the browser's all set
To take him to the Advocates home on the Internet!
While there he can also subscribe for free
To the Liberator Online, the Advocates' acclaimed bi-weekly!

"Sally wants to reach libertarians in her home town,
So I've brought her the very finest libertarian outreach tool around!
Operation Politically Homeless will do the trick —
She'll find hundreds of new libertarians!" chuckled old St. Nick.

Then he pulled out a vast supply of pocket-sized cards
And I could guess what they were, without trying too hard.
"Here's a few thousand World's Smallest Political Quiz cards, too!
That should last her for at least a month or two!

"This family wants to communicate the ideas of freedom clearly,
So Advocates CDs are gifts they'll treasure dearly:
Titles like "Personal Responsibility" and the "Essence of Political Persuasion"
Will make them successful libertarian communicators on every occasion!"

From his bag he brought forth yet more great surprises —
Libertarian T-shirts, in all different sizes,
Festooned with clever slogans. Then books galore
By Browne, Bergland, Cloud, Ruwart — and so many more!

By now our living room seemed filled to overflowing,
But still Santa kept on going and going.
He scattered libertarian children's books to fill one an empty spot.
"So many great Advocates books — they'll all like these a lot!"

He was bringing out still more goodies, but I could stand it no more
So I stepped out from hiding and stood by the door.
He smiled at me and winked, and I knew instantly
He'd known I was there throughout his gift-giving spree.

"I just wanted to thank you —" I began to say.
But he held up his hand and smiled in his jolly way.
"There's no need for thanks! It's a great pleasure to me
To give gifts to people who love liberty!

"The Advocates has made it easy for me and my elves —
In fact, we hardly have any work to do ourselves!
For people who want to see our world freed,
The Advocates has just the products and services we need.

"If you want to thank me, the very best thing you can do 
Is to support the Advocates — so their great work can continue. 
That's why I'm leaving this copy of the Advocates 2013 Annual Report letter
Please read it and consider giving a donation — so their work can get even better! 

I wanted to say more, but he put his finger to his nose,
Then — POOF! Straight up through my chimney he rose!
I went to my window, saw the sleigh shoot to the sky,
And as they faded away, I heard Santa cry:

"On, Free Speech! On, Tolerance! On, Liberty!
Our world is yearning to be set free!
One day soon all will see liberty's light —
Merry Christmas to all! And to all, a Good Night!"
Forward to Friend

What's Happening with the Advocates


ADVOCATES LIBERTARIAN COMMUNICATION EVENTS: Advocates President Sharon Harris will be conducting libertarian communication workshops or giving speeches at these upcoming events:
January 2014: Communication workshop in New Orleans. Place and date TBA.
January 2014: Communication workshop in Kennesaw, GA. Place and date TBA.
February 2014: Communication workshop in Nashville. Place and date TBA.
March 2014: Communication workshop in Colorado. Sunday, March 30, Golden, Colorado, sponsored by the Libertarian Party of Colorado.

Attendees will learn how to dramatically increase their effectiveness at communicating the ideas of liberty. 

Email us now if you'd like us to send you further information on these events. 

Email Sharon to find out how you can have a communication event near you.

FREE OPH KITS FOR LIBERTARIAN STUDENT GROUPS: Thanks to the generosity of our supporters, we're giving our acclaimed OPH (Operation Political Homeless) outreach kits to libertarian student groups FREE — if they simply promise to use them a minimum of three times a year and send us photos documenting their OPH activity. OPH — praised as the best recruiting tool in the libertarian movement — normally sells for $50.00.
If you're in a student libertarian group, click here for more information on getting your free OPH kit.

JOIN US ON TWITTER: Twitter is the first place to learn about breaking Advocates and liberty movement news, expert communications tips, and exclusive Advocates discounts and specials. (And don't worry — we won't bombard you with tweets. We're keeping it fun, fast, and useful.)
Go to the Advocates Twitter account and click the "follow" button below our picture. Thanks!

JOIN THE ADVOCATES ON FACEBOOK: The Advocates Facebook page offers you a chance to share your ideas on liberty, meet some great people and show your support for the Advocates for Self-Government and liberty. Join us and you'll receive regular Facebook updates on Advocates news, communication tips, and special offers for our Facebook friends.

2014 FREEDOM CRUISES: Advocates Board Secretary and long-time libertarian leader Dr. Ken Bisson invites you to join him for a Freedom Cruise. Enjoy a wonderful trip on a luxury cruiser — at a bargain rate! Great food and fine company. Non-libertarians welcome! On January 26, 2014 the 17th Annual Freedom Cruise embarks: a 7-day Holland America voyage to excellent snorkeling destinations Grand Cayman and Cozumel, with visits to Key West and Half Moon Cay as well, all on Holland America's newest cruise ship! (These aren't Advocates events, but libertarians who have been on past cruises rave about them.) Ken offers two other February 2014 cruises as well. For photos and more details — or to sign up for free, no-pressure, no-commitment email updates — visit Freedom Cruises.
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