Kids & Families Together
It’s Already Halloween…
This year is flying by, so it’s only fitting that we are in preparation for kids favorite candy filled holiday, Halloween. Halloween is not only fun because of the sugar filled treats, but also because it’s the one time a year that we can let our imaginations run wild and dress up as anything our little hearts desire.  All of the preparation is just as fun as the actual day: carving pumpkins, making spooky desserts, making/buying costumes, as well as decorating our doorsteps to scare those that dare ring the doorbell- ready to scream the candy giving universal secret password. 
Whether you and yours choose to go trick-or-treating or stay in to pass out candy K&FT would like to pass on some tips to keep everyone safe on this exciting day. 
Passing out candy:
¨ Be sure that all lights leading up to door as well as porch lights are working.
¨ Clean up anything that children can trip over (toys, bikes, garden tools/hoses, lawn decorations).
¨ Make sure pets are secure inside, for their safety as well as the safety of the children approaching your home.
¨ Always have an adult accompany the children through the neighborhood.
¨ Never go up to a home with no lights on, this is usually a sign that this home is not participating in the festivities. Plus it’s dangerous to approach a dark home.
¨ Bring a flashlight to navigate through the dark streets.
¨ Make sure everyone walks to prevent trip and falls.
-Try and trick-or-treat in groups since it is easier for cars to  see  clusters.  The buddy system is also safer.      
¨ Do not cut across lawns (it is polite to use walkways)
¨ Be sure to bring a cellphone (just in case anything does happen you can contact law enforcement quickly)
- Be sure to wait until you get home to closely inspect all candy
received. Throw away any partially opened wrappers, suspicious items, and any expired treats.

K&FT encourages all of our families to have a lot of fun this
Halloween, but most importantly to keep safety in mind.  If you can, take lots of pictures so you can see how cool your costumes are year after year. Happy Halloween!

Having Faith

Dear Faith,
Now that school has started, we are beginning to face some challenges with our eight-year-old adopted daughter at school. Just yesterday, she came home and said that the teacher didn’t let her have lunch for two days because she had talked during class. My first response was to let her know that I knew that she was clearly lying but I have learned enough about becoming a therapeutic parent to know that this response is not that effective for a child who was
neglected in her early life and has suffered some
major trauma. Can you give me some ideas of how to handle this issue?
Needing Help in Santa Paula
Dear Needing Help,
It is not that unusual for a child with a history of neglect and trauma to come home from school and make bizarre claims about the teacher’s behavior. You already have a pretty clear idea that your child is making this all up but you need to stay calm (emotionally regulated) and not accuse your child of lying.

If this is what your child expresses to you say something like, “Wow! That is really serious. I think your daddy and I need to go to school tomorrow and talk with your teacher.” Then be sure and follow up and meet with the teacher. From this meeting, make it clear to your child that there is goodwill  and  communication between you and your child’s teacher. Hopefully, following, this talk with the teacher, you can begin to coach your daughter in how to express her needs more directly.It is always a good idea for you to make arrangements ahead of time with teachers about triangulation. That way, any time either side gets what
appears to be an outlandish assertion by your child; the adult automatically is scripted to say, “That is serious. We better go talk about it with (the other adult) tomorrow.” If you wonder why your adopted child is using this type of behavior, remember that children only use tactics like triangulation because at some point they felt they had to rely entirely on themselves. Triangulation, while disturbing, is just another survival strategy. It is a self-protective device. Don’t take your child’s behavior personally.

Alice’s House Update

We now have a permanent home for Alice’s House in Ventura!  The new space honors Alice McGrath, a lifelong social justice and human rights activist, and   houses young women who have aged out of the foster care system. 

Through a series of grants and loans, Kids & Families Together has obtained a house on Moon Drive that will be the “new” Alice’s House; a safe and stable home that will provide individualized services and support to maximize the opportunities for young women from the foster system to grow, thrive and become self-sufficient. 

Alice’s House currently accommodates three young women and a live-in Resident Advisor who provides case management and mentoring.  The Housing      Authority of San Buenaventura has approved Section 8 Vouchers for the residents; their support will help us with housing expenses. 

Alice’s House urgently needs tree trimming and brush clearance as well as landscaping before the rainy season begins.  If you or someone you know can help us out, please contact us at 805-643-1446, or via email at

Boo Cups
Fun & Easy Halloween Treat for the Family

Total Time: 15min
Prep Time: 15min
Servings: 15

What you will need:

2 pkg. (3.9 oz. each) JELL-O Chocolate Instant Pudding
3-1/4 cups  cold milk
1 tub (8 oz.) COOL WHIP Whipped Topping, thawed, divided
20   OREO Cookies, crushed (about 1-3/4 cups), divided
30 miniature semi-sweet chocolate chips

Make it:
BEATpudding mixes and milk in large bowl with whisk 2 min. Stir in half eachof the COOL WHIP and cookie crumbs.
SPOON1 Tbsp. of the remaining crumbs into each of 15 (6-oz.) plastic cups. Cover with layers of pudding mixture and remaining crumbs.
DROPremaining COOL WHIP by spoonfulls onto desserts to resemble ghosts. Add chocolate chips for the eyes.

Kraft Kitchen Tips
Save 50 calories and 2g of fat per serving by preparing with fat-free milk, JELL-O Chocolate Fat Free Sugar Free Instant Pudding, COOL WHIP LITE Whipped Topping and Reduced Fat OREO Cookies.
Instead of spooning remaining COOL WHIP onto the desserts, use a re-sealable plastic bag to make the ghosts. Fill bag with remaining COOL WHIP; seal bag. Use scissors to diagonally cut off corner from bottom of bag. Squeeze COOL WHIP from bag to resemble the ghosts.



October 22-23:
14th Annual Underwood Family Farms Fall Harvest Festival - Western Heritage Weekend-10am-3pm  @ 3370 Sunset Valley Road, Moorpark, CA. Stunt ropers, country music, cowboy poetry, a medicine show and much more! New this year - we welcome to the Main Stage -The California Cowboy Band on October 22, and Tumbling Tumbleweeds on October 23! At 3:00pm, the Wild West rides off into the sunset and the Hollow Trees liven up the stage with their high-energy children's music. The Underwood Family Farms' 14th Annual Fall Harvest Festival in Moorpark from October 1st through October 31st. Admission to the festival is $12.00 on Saturdays and Sundays and $3.00 per person Monday through Friday. For more information visit: www.underwoodfamilyfarms.

October 29:
12th Annual Reign of Terror Haunted House Lights On Tour for Kids-1pm-4pm at Janss Marketplace (215 N. Moorpark Rd. Thousand Oaks, CA). The Reign of Terror Haunted House will be open every Friday and Saturday, Oct. 7-29 as well as Sunday, Oct. 30, and Monday, Oct. 31, from 7-10 PM, and on Saturdays and Monday, Halloween night hours will be from 7-11 PM.  Profits from the $13 admission ticket sales will help Conejo Recreation and Park District youth programs including The Young Artists Ensemble and The Thousand Oaks Teen Center.

October 30:
17th Annual Farmer's Market Pumpkin Fun Day at Channel Islands Harbor- 10:30am-1:00pm, 3600 S. Harbor Blvd. Oxnard, CA. Enjoy a wonderful fall harvest day that is FREE to the public! Pumpkin decorating contest, pumpkin bowling, pumpkin weight guessing, two sessions of trick or treating (one for young children at 11:00 a.m. and another for older children at 11:30 a.m.), children's costume parade, and a costume contest with prizes at 12:00 p.m. The certified Farmers & Fishermen's Market will feature a wonderful fall harvest from local farmers and daily fresh catch seafood by local fishermen, arts & crafts, food, live music and much more.

In this series of classes, you will learn how your own attachment history influences your parenting and gain the tools to improve your parent/child relationship.
4 Thursdays
October 13, October 20, October 27 & November 3
Registration: 643-1446
Location: Kids & Families Together Center
856 E. Thompson Blvd.  93001
Designed as follow-up support to the 4-Week Series.
 3RD Tuesday
2011: Oct. 15, Nov. 15
2012: Jan. 17, Feb. 21, Mar., 20, Apr. 17, May 15, June 19
All sessions are from 6:30 until 8:30 pm.
Location: Kids & Families Together Center
856 E. Thompson Blvd.  93001

Kinship Support & Resources Group         
in partnership with Ventura Foster & Kinship Care Education
2nd and  4th Tuesdays
Time:  6-8pm
Location: Kids & Families Together Center
856 E. Thompson Blvd.  93001
in partnership with Camarillo Health Care District and Moorpark College’s Foster & Kinship Care Education Program
2nd and 4th Thursdays
Time:  9am-10:30am
Location:  Camarillo Health Care District 3639 Las Posas Rd.



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