This week, we are discussing:

Letting go and holding on.

How do we know which one to do.

In the song 'The Gambler' by Kenny Rodgers he talks about playing cards. He says you have to

'know when to hold em,
know when to fold em,
know when to walk away and
know when to run...'

Life and love can be the same. In personal development circles there seems to be an ongoing conversation about 'not giving up' on your dreams. But how long do you hold on to a dream and how much energy do you give it and how do you know when it is time to walk away?

I think we are constantly assessing our lives. Everything we do we do because there is some sort of gain in it. When the pain of continuing is greater than the gain it may be time to walk away. I don't mean that we shouldn't put in our best effort to create a great world around us. And sometime we will have to have some pain - childbirth and excersize are just two examples. However, if we have been trying to make something happen for a long time and it just doesn't seem to come together, maybe a relationship or a business idea, we may have to tweak our expectations or to walk away and try something else.

The second verse in the song says -

Now Ev'ry gambler knows that the secret to survivin'

Is knowin' what to throw away and knowing what to keep.

'Cause ev'ry hand's a winner and ev'ry hand's a loser,

If we are working towards a goal, or working on a relationship that seems to be hard work, the idea is still the same. There is the potential for win or a loss is within every situation. Everything you do, from walking the dog to starting or ending a relationship, to putting together a business deal, to planning a holiday, has within it things that need to be thrown away and things to keep. Let's look at a couple of examples.

walkiing the dog
keep - momentum to excersize and love for dog.
throw away - excuses - I'm too tired, it's wet etc...

starting a realtionship
keep - openness, excitement of getting to know someone, feeling of being loved.
throw away - fear of being hurt, remnants of past relationships.

ending a relationship
keep- all the good and happy memories and the lessons you learn about who you are and how you do relationships.
throw away - self hatred, blame, guilt and longing for things to be different.

putting together a business deal
keep - optimism, organisation, eyes open for opportunities.
throw away - lack of belief in yourself, memories of past failures.

planning a holiday
keep - spaces for spontaneous adventures, well organised plans to departure, arrival and safety.
throw away - preconceived ideas of what you 'must see' and do, fear of things going wrong.

So often the things we need to let go of are the negative thoughts that we are so good at putting in our own way. Those thoughts and memories belong in the past. When moving forward, take the experience and the learning but leave the negative feelings behind you. Start each new thing with optimism and joy.

So, go forward with joy, optimism and the knowledge that everything has a gift within it. Sometimes the gift will be clear. Sometimes it won't.

till next time.

Sherry

Letting go and holding on.

How do we know which one to do.

The thing that is really hard, and really amazing, is giving up on being perfect and beginning the work of becoming yourself.

Dream and give yourself permission to envision a You that you choose to be.

We all have dreams. But in order to make dreams come into reality, it takes an awful lot of determination, dedication, self-discipline, and effort.