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Do It Yourself
Dear Goddess Of Public Speaking...
" Can you give me some quick tips on being less self conscious? I feel like I'm under a microscope when I speak, especially to large groups. " P.B., HR MANAGER
" Letting Go Of Self-Consciousness "
Self-consciousness is the acute feeling of separation from everyone else. The strong feelings it generates include loneliness, of being "different", not being "good enough" or being rejected. And it can feel like you're "under a microscope."
When you speak to a group, you visibly and energetically set yourself apart from your herd. Speaking up does require a kind of courage. The courage to show yourself to others. And why do bigger groups seem scarier than smaller ones? Well there's just so many more wild cards you potentially have to control and convince and rejection could occur on a really, really big scale...
There is however, a straightforward antidote to self consciousness in front of groups. A few quick tips will not suffice on this occasion; I'm going to give you one big piece of advice:
Change your belief that you are not separate but connected to your group by the very thick cord of humanity which binds us all. It is your vulnerability that reaches out heart to heart to deepen your connection to the group. When you hide it, you hide yourself and your group just gets meaningless drone, pie charts and technical facts. They can get that reading a report.
When a group shows up to hear you, they want to hear, YOU. When you fail to show up yourself, you are choosing to separate yourself from your group. And entering stage left, creep in feelings of being different or not being good enough.
Before you speak to a group, rather than reduce yourself to the size of a protoplasm under a microscope, see yourself as expansive and strong, perhaps like a giant tree or mountain. Try sticking them under a microscope!
P.B.! Be that tree! Be that mountain! Take yourself out from under the microscope and don't let yourself be diminished by your fear. Couldn't this be something to relax and expand into, rather than shrink and pull away from?
And when your time comes to step forward and lead your group, breathe into your core and connect with yourself, feel your feet on the ground, let yourself expand and open up to receive the positive attention flowing your way, if you let it in. Use your whole body to express your message - be large. And be with one person at a time. Don't try and "work" the whole group, just enjoy a series of one to one conversations, one human being to another.
How often have you wanted to heal this old fear of speaking in public, or just learn how to do it with authentic, natural ease – but you never seem to find the time, the groups are inconvenient or too confronting, or you just can't afford it? Goddess Of Public Speaking now offers a step-by-step Do It Yourself e-Workbook for nervous public speakers wanting to free their Inner Public Speaker by themselves. The Confidence & Connection E-Workbook offers self paced, step by step, low cost learning. View the Sample Pages and listen to the MP3.
The first ten Cool, Calm & Connected enews subscribers will also receive a 30 minute Free Your Inner Speaker Session, worth $65.00. "Confidence & Connection ebook is a wonderful and generous resource to refer back to. It brought greater awareness to what I was learning. Helpful for staying on track and practicing." Emelia, NATURAL THERAPIST
Buy it now & book your session with Geraldine.
Rate between 1 and 10 how cool, calm and connected you feel:
When you speak and lead with natural ease and authenticity, you will be closer to 10. When you feel scattered, distracted or unconfident, you will be closer to 1.
What To Do: If you are above a 7 today, notice what's working well and keep doing it. Accept that daily variations in confidence and clarity are normal. If you are below a 7 today, listen to and practise the Inner Calm exercise. You can also download our 2 free A4 Posters of the Inner Calm exercise and the Calm Barometer.